In my last post, I focused on a man who called me a coward on social media - unprovoked. Today a
colleague was rude to me (in a private chat message) during a Zoom meeting. It was a coffee hour
meeting we are encouraged to attend. It is right before one of the classes I teach and I almost didn't go
because I had things to do, but decided I wanted to share something important if given the chance. I
really wrestled with sharing what I did - it wasn't easy to do, it was real and honest, and possibly
uncomfortable - but I was given the opportunity, so I did share. The private message I received was
beyond unkind and it made me realize why I usually avoid meetings, why I hesitate to contribute when I do attend, and why I am doing something I disdain - wishing for retirement. I guess the stress of the situation is getting to people, and I am an easy target. I shouldn't let it bother me - but it does. I
responded to him with "thanks, really appreciate being scolded by you. Why didn't you share your note with the whole group so everyone could bask in your kindness?" And he messaged back "I apologize." As if saying I'm sorry inoculates one from responsibility for being a jerk?

It's a beautiful day today and I feel pretty optimistic, but I made sure to comment on the journal I'm writing about something that bothered me yesterday. Here it is: "I am not sure whether this is related to the pandemic or restrictions in terms of my feelings, because I always obsess when someone is unkind or irrational, but I do believe the individual I am going to write about was being influenced by the "open it up" sentiment some have been expressing. Yesterday a man attacked me on Facebook for no reason. He called me a coward and said I do not deserve to be in office (I am a very low level practically a volunteer elected official). We were not engaged in a debate and I do not argue about politics or anything else on Facebook. He was mad about the postponed elections and commented on the reminder I posted about it on my public group. When I asked him who he was addressing (as a coward), the governor or BOE, he said me! Then proceeded to spin out of control. I have heard he isn't a nice person, he's an abusive philanderer and a drunk, but I have no clue why I would be a target. If I was a young man rather than a middle aged / oldish woman, I would beat him up for calling me that name!"

My next post from Cornell study: I wrote this yesterday but was using a tablet and think it did not save. I am upset that people are pushing to re-open. Not that I am unsympathetic to business and unemployment, but I'm scared people will be careless, not social distance, and we will have a spike in cases. People protesting! Really? Also ignorance on Facebook - blaming the left or the right. Why are people so petty? I thought we were all in this together.

I didn't write this as an entry (yet), but Facebook "friends" who take the appalling Darwinist view that the vulnerable should just die are held to the policy displayed in the cartoon below. It's better than a sleepless night, or a commenting argument. (Although I am so tempted to respond to their cold, hearless views by writing inspired by Scrooge ("are there no workhouses?," -- "wouldt you be offended if I took the similar position of asking why I should care about unemployed people with money problems? I have a good job. I have a cushion. I can work from home. Why didn't the struggling get a better education, find more secure jobs, and be smarter about saving money?") Of course I would never respond that way, it's just a fantasy.

On March 1 -- I meant to post that it was the 18th anniversary of this blog. I didn't, which is no surprise, given my infrequent posting in the past few years. The Village election was postponed (at this point, no new date set), which was also no surprise, because we are in the middle of a pandemic. It's excruciating - both the postponement (two opponents and my need to get going!) and the pandemic, which has changed everything. I'm OK, but this is a surreal time to say the least. I have wanted to journal, wondered what Elwyn wrote in 1918 (diary is not extant, or at least was not available for transcription). But, for whatever reason, I didn't write here or privately, then a few days ago, I joined this Cornell effort.

Here is my first post: At first my job felt like I was drinking from a fire hose, there were so many needs. Now it has settled into a boring routine, although about 1/4 of my students are struggling for one reason or another. I worry about my very elderly parents, I worry about my siblings and myself, since we are all (young-ish) seniors. I mourn having to skip all our loud, large family gathering, I don't like not being able to adopt a new cat after Teddy died (by now in normal times I think I would have). I can't stand the blame game, the finger pointing, all the political divisiveness. I notice many young (20s, 30s, 40s) people in the daily count of people who have tested positive. Are they essential workers I wonder, or selfish jers who are not staying home and social distancing? I am happy it has been cold, since I suspect warm temperatures would encourage people to go out & about rather than to social distance & stay home. Plus, I've discovered masks are pretty hot! I'm glad no one is flying and there is less driving, our environment needs the break. It alarms me on Facebook to see people discussing the rescheduling of travel plans -- really? Not only am I afraid to restart - to go out in public, I am too vulnerable - but hello! All this wasteful business and vacation flying helped to spread the virus (and BTW as I already mentioned, it damages the environment).I hope the pandemic changes us - makes us utilize technology instead of planes, causes us to work from home (The Greening of America was 40 years ago!!), be more flexible, more appreciative, less materialistic.

 

Inspired to make this by the Facebook group 518rainbowhunt

Today is Rosie's 8th Gotcha Day!!

In other news...the professor who has the room after me is a rude b*tch. OMG, talk about "micro-aggression." This is just plain aggression. She was so mean today. She's been mean to me before, but today she was mean to one of my students!

Although I would like to get another cat right away, Rosie is old, and we have to be mindful of what is best for her. I know something perfect will come along eventually.

A very sad time. Our Ted passed away suddenly on Sunday. He must have had a stroke in the night. He was nearly 15, the best cat ever. RIP sweet Teddy.

I reviewed the rosters for my spring semester classes and one of them has more students with unpronounceable first names than I've ever had in a class of 25. As someone with a name that is routinely misspelled and / or mispronounced, I completely "get" the need to be sensitive. It's common to have some students with unique or unfamiliar names in class, but this list isn't mostly international students, or simply parents choosing clever phonetic spelling or culturally inspired monikers. Something must have been going on twenty years ago. Maybe it was the impact of the millennium or hanging chads or 9/11. Really hoping several save me when I am stumbling over Jxldyrr and Zjnlee by suggesting I call them Jo and Zee.

Happy New Year! Didn't want to let January slide by without making a post. I've had several thoughts about things to write since my last post, but then never actually logged on and composed. The one that comes to mind right now: we watched two movies within the past few weeks. First, was Eat, Pray, Love. I can't believe we'd never seen it before. It is new to Netflix (I think) and it caught my attention in an email. It was entertaining (I guess) but also annoying. Why do we celebrate shallow things and act as if they are actually deep? The second is a fairly new movie, The Mule. Also entertaining, but seriously? Clint Eastwood is the star and yay to him still working, but why - even when a senior actress is cast in the role of his ex-wife - is there still a ridiculous gap in age - and she is the sickly, dying character?

Bob turned 60 a couple weeks ago. We always go to the movies for his birthday, because he likes going to a movie theatre. In the age of streaming I could skip it. Anyway, we couldn't make going to the theatre work for various reasons, so bought the Eastwood movie streaming on Amazon instead. I promised a rain check!

I'm not sure why it looks crooked. Doesn't appear that way IRL.
Here's a beautiful story, beautifully written.

Here's a beautiful piece of writing. And, I couldn't agree more. Unfortunately I don't think anyone is interested in toleration. That reminds me, I haven't taught it in a year, and probably will not be teaching that class again. I have not been annoyed by this change because it hadn't been fun to teach for a while. But I will be teaching ethics; that's a good thing.

Two steps forward, one step back. If animal abusers are permitted to walk free, get their animals back, or the shelters have to bear the cost...no words I can write here. I am so mad!

Now my university account is requiring a two-step log in. Seriously, the hacking situation must be at crisis level or something. The process wanted my cell number, and I thought, no way, even though that was the recommended choice. My cell is often not charged, and frequently is downstairs, far from my computer.

The past couple months, I have no luck logging into accounts I've paid electronically for years, I am forced to submit a forgotten password request, create a new password, verify the account, answer the security question - every time I log on. I don't even bother with trying to remember any more, because no matter whether ScReWuIhAtEdOiNgThIs7$ is correct, it never works. What is going on? Is hacking really this rampant? It's making mailing in paper checks seem efficient.

This is excruciating!! But I am glad to see another small Village was empowered enough to apply.

On Tuesday night, a house five houses away burned. It was a total loss. It was next door to a county-owned house (seized for taxes) that was condemned & unsafe, and that was demolished too. These two little row houses were similar to mine, which originally was in a row of 13 nearly identical houses built circa1900-1905 for factory workers, and now they have been torn down (three had already been lost when I moved here in 1987). It's so sad to lose old buildings, but a derelict structure that is too far gone to save is worse. It is the fault of bad owners, and a tax sale process that enables them.

I wrote in the DRI proposal that we only get publicity from fatal car crashes & sex offenders living in town, but apparently fires grab headlines too.

Imagine calling the police because you don't feel like being bothered with the public you represent! How dare someone FOIL! Sure the public can be obnoxious and loudmouthed and sometimes a little crazy but that's the job. It's truly amazing how entitled many elected officials become. It's shameful - but this story comes as no surprise to me.  I could say a whole lot more about background unrelated to this particular town, but still relevant -- but I won't.

Be bold! That's leadership.

I think he didn't mean to be offensive, but he should know better.  And - I still feel this way about the Times Union's obnoxious POV.

A rant. Everywhere on campus, the paper towels are being removed and replaced with air dryers. I am so pissed. Everyone knows those things suck filth from the floor and blow it on your hands. Also, how do you dry your face? Finally, I always use a paper towel between my hand and door knobs or elevator buttons. Guess what? I have not had a cold in ages, and I am already sick from this. I completely blame the University at Albany. (I hope there is a BOT scanning the web for mentions.)  I know the justification is being "green." OK -- my carbon footprint is quite likely less than anyone on this campus. My house is 900 square feet. I don't drive. The last time I flew in a plane was 1988. I am a vegetarian. I compost. I founded in 2017 and have organized Repair Cafe for the Village for over two years. Regardless, I call BS. The reason for the change is probably to cut janitorial staff. I WANT PAPER TOWELS IN THE BATHROOM.